Have you ever been lit on fire? I have.
Seven times precisely. Some might call it bad luck, but being set alight didn’t hurt me, it made me feel alive.
It was a special type of fire that kissed my skin. The flames were not orange and red; they were bright white and seemed to glow and sparkle as they engulfed me. These flames weren’t scalding hot, they were warm and lush, infecting me with such ecstasy that, when they faded, I was left yearning for more. Rather than burning from the outside in, they gripped me from the inside, and then spread through my body, my stomach, all my organs, and out towards my limbs and hair like an uncontrollable energy. The flames grasped the people around me and wove between us, as we all burned together. Each time I was lit on fire it lasted hours, but I wasn’t left with any welts or scars. In fact, I have no visible marks at all, just sweet memories of the joyous warmth that encapsulated my entire being.
What kind of fire can touch you but not burn you, can be felt but not seen, can start from within you and take over your whole body?
It is a fire that builds slowly, when you know something is about to happen, but you don’t know when. When you are surrounded by hundreds, even thousands, of people and twice as many eyes all pointed at one singular thing, desperately wanting, anxiously waiting, for the same person to appear. The fire starts as a small spark within each and every one of you. Months before you are all gathered in the same place, for the same purpose, at the same time, an ember ignites inside you, and grows hotter and hotter until the spark is released on the ever anticipated day. That spark collects more and more energy the closer, and closer, you get to the time that person, whom you adore but have never met, will appear. As that sparkle of energy excites, it begins to whizz around, bumping against your insides and scorching your organs, leaving behind a bubbly sting that flares through your body. Moments before they appear, you are jittery with anticipation.
You can’t miss it. Can’t miss the moment where that one person will appear, that one beautiful person ultimately responsible for the fire that is burning you.
A match is struck. Your body is lighter fluid. The fire ignites and rushes through you. Breath quickens, heart beats faster and faster. You aren’t afraid, you are restless. The fire is eating you up inside. You just can’t wait any longer. You just can’t wait. Darkness engulfs you as the light sprints away from the audience and culminates in a spotlight on the stage where those thousands of burning eyes are fixated. You strain to see over heads and around bodies. You need a good view. You can’t miss it. Can’t miss the moment where that one person will appear, that one beautiful person ultimately responsible for the fire that is burning you. The bodies around you are blazing, bumping into each other, unable to contain their explosive passion. Cheers bounce off arena walls and…
And then it all begins.
Sharp percussion of drums. Twangy strumming of a guitar. There they are, center stage, lights flashing around them, microphone pressed to their lips as they look at you. Only you. You hold your breath, the fire collecting in your lungs, yearning to get out. Their melodic voice wafts through the air and towards your ears. Finally, the first note of the night has been sung.
The roof and walls of the arena melt with heat. You have been lifted out of your body, joining the mass of fans whose hearts beat as one on this night.
You are levitating.
That breath explodes out of your lungs like a firework in a reverberating scream. Their voice has enchanted you all. Feet glide to the rhythm, mouths sing the words they know so well. Feeding off the energy of the firestarter, the audience explodes with ecstasy and joy. The roof and walls of the arena melt with heat. You have been lifted out of your body, joining the mass of fans whose hearts beat as one on this night. Screaming, cheering, dancing. Hands are in the air, waving back and forth to the music as one body, holding beams of white light that glow brighter as they combine and light up the sky.
In this moment, every word and every movement of the singer is sensational, and you hang on like a lifeline to that bright, flaming star. Your world revolves around them as their light sends exploding rockets of love into the audience, keeping the fire going.
When the concert ends the venue has been burnt to the ground, transformed from an arena to a haven of shared passion and adoration for the art of the firestarting singer. The fire starts to fade as the last note is sung, and the artist leaves the stage, thanking their blazing fans, and saying good night. The flames are gone, but dying sparks are still buzzing inside of you.
I just want to stay here, burning, with the music, forever.
